Saying this kind of thing online is always dangerous; what with trolls, passionate protesters, and sometimes just people who want to yell for no good reason, I do realise I could be letting myself in for a world of trouble, but I feel this needs to be said: I’m Pro-Woman.
What do I mean? I mean that I don’t like abortion, but I do like, love and care for women, and women do not deserve to be treated like scum, like they are below me, or in any other negative way, because they want/believe in/support abortion and a woman’s right to choose.
I have heard many people talk about babies/foetus’ as human whilst simultaneously treating pro-choicers as subhuman (and vice versa). That doesn’t make sense to me at all. It’s either all or none, and he without sin throw the first rock, etc. Even if you believe that abortion is murder, or sin, or a number of other things, there is no excuse for making someone feel as if they want to die themselves for even thinking it. Tolerance of everyone doesn’t mean until they disagree with your view.
I believe that if you don’t like the idea of abortion, then you need to start liking the idea of adoption, and I mean practically.
Hypothetical situation: you see a teenage girl in a coffee shop and she’s upset. You ask her if she’s OK, and she says she pregnant. She doesn’t know who the father is because she was drunk at a party. Her parents are not remotely supportive. She’s still in school, she hasn’t got a job, she sees no way out except for abortion. She doesn’t feel like she could look after a baby anyway.
OK, so it’s a common thread of arguments worldwide, but I listened to a talk from someone who had been a woman talking to this girl. She then asked IF there was a way she could have the baby and know things were going to be OK, would she have an abortion? The girl said no. At this point, this amazing woman offered her space in her home, open adoption of her baby, but space and support for the teenager too if she wanted to continue with school but still be around her child.
This is not just one situation, she has had this talk with a number of could-be-mothers often who she met completely by chance, some turned her down outright and she sat with them holding their hand through the abortion procedure, some asked her to adopt their child but couldn’t deal with being around as well. Whatever the answer, whatever the discussion brought up, this woman loved them, cared for them, and treated them as best she could.
This form of support is what I think many women and girls lack when going through this decision. Those who have an abortion are not evil, whether or not they do what I would do. I cannot completely align myself with Pro-choice because abortion upsets me deeply, I do not think it is ever a good thing. On the other hand, however I feel about abortion I cannot force anyone to follow my wishes and freedom is something I find extremely important (particularly when it comes to saving the life of the mother), so Pro-life isn’t quite me either.
I choose pro-woman because I understand the pressures we face, the decisions we make honestly hoping for the best, and completely accepting that one day someone may need my help, either in adoption or taking them into my home or holding their hand.
And I will love them just the same.
UPDATE: This is an incredibly moving video about adoption that really shows the difference it can make to children who are in need of more than just a family, but health help too. Click here to watch a presentation from Shift.
- Question: So About Abortion – I Am Pro-People (thewayeverlasting.com)